I am not prepared

Okay so I know that this sounds strange but I honestly wonder if I could have been prepared. I was born in 1982, I went to school in the 80’s-00’s, not once was I provided any education on what to do when my parents cannot take care of themselves anymore. At least when you have children there are parenting classes to help figure out what you need to do but nothing for when your parents get old. If there is I have not been introduced to it. I am not trying to have a woe is me moment, I just think it would have been good to teach this in a class or a semester. Home economics was basically being phased out when I was in high school but I do not believe help like that was offered. I know some of this should be a no brainer but after the 2nd head trauma with my mother and her being diagnosed with delirium on top of the beginning stages of dementia it would have been nice to have a bag of tricks to dig through to combat some of this even a little bit. When I heard delirium I had to remind myself what year we were living in. The good thing is, it should go away the bad part is since she is in an advanced age it could take months.

I think all of this would be easier if I had the help of my sibling, she has truly checked out of anything that has to deal with taking care of my parents especially my mother, the only help she provides is to tell me that I am spending too much money and my mortgage is too much. Not once has she offered to fly into town and help me with my parents, help me make sure each of them are taking their medications, help me make sure that they are eating, help me keep the house clean etc. All her children are in college and do not live at home and she does not have a job so there is no reason that she cannot help. As one can imagine I have a lot of anger toward her. I am sure I am not the only one that has a sibling that chooses not to help. My husband has been my anchor he has picked up the slack when I am at work he does the cooking and the laundry. When my mom was home he was a Rockstar.

I just want to know I am not alone, mentally I am fried and emotionally I am a wreck, but I cannot breakdown because so many people need and depend on me. Not including my dog Lucy who cuddles when she knows I need a good cuddle.